CRL West is back and isn't it fucking great! As a writer, I consider myself to be quite a wordsmith with an extensive vocabulary, but sometimes "fucking" is just the best adjective to use to describe exactly how I feel. I loved day one. It was FUCKING GREAT. There was controversy, outstanding individual performances, great game play, a bunch of new faces, and so much more. Most importantly, there were casters who didn't make me want to put my head into an oven preheated to 450F (400F if fan forced) I watched the English version and then checked out some of the Spanish (more on that later) and if these guys were anything like the CRL East casters, you would have seen my arse sticking out of Rf's oven in his kitchen. LIQUID vs CREAM - Screengate Two of the big guns, teams fancied to make the worlds, kicked off the season, and though the match featured plenty to talk about, it was what happened afterwards on social media which became the major talking point of day one. See pic above. We all knew Razzer was a lock for one of the spots in Liquid's 2v2, but they surprised me by pairing him with Kanny instead of Surge. I think most of us were clueless regarding who Cream would send out, but the pairing of Bad Boy Michy and DiegoE was not only a wise choice, but they were great to watch as well. It didn't look good for them early as Liquid took the first game. Kanny was so happy, he continuously kept giving the thumbs up, and Razzer was all smiles, as he chilled and stroked his flowing locks in a manner eerily similar to how I play with a woman's hair during sex. Then the Cream boys turned it all around. Game 3 was amazing. Sure, we did see the Xbox used in Asia just recently, but for Bad Boy Michy and Diego to use it in their first match in the deciding battle of a set, took balls bigger than the Incredible Hulk's, and didn't they do it in style? Bad Boy Michy's nado on the ceiling fan was just one of many delights. Wait, what the fuck is wrong with me? I'm a golem player. Why am I saying nice things about Xbox? Another voice in my head: "You have to stay objective, Gramps, when reporting facts" My original voice: "Yeah, but fucking Xbox?' The other voice again: "You do make a strong point" As much as it hurts to stay, it was very refreshing to watch the dual Xboxes. This match was the coverage I rewatched on the Spanish broadcast even though I don't speak the language. You don't have to understand it to enjoy Koji's "tuk tuk tuk tuk tuk tuk" when the Xbox gets a lock. I giggle EVERY.SINGLE.TIME
Before I get into discussing Screengate, there are two other issues I would like to address. Firstly, lets not take anything away from Belli. He played really well and deserved his SWEEP (not "all kill", you fucking morons) He got some favours when Egor DCed, but such is the nature of online comps. Perhaps Rich and Andrew should have another device on which to watch elixir, because they made a rare error and missed the DC. Fortunately, they made up for it by correctly calling Belli's performance a "sweep". Secondly, I played semi-pro sports all my adult life, right up until I was 40. I was paid to play football and cricket. I have certain standards which I believe in when it comes to sport, and these should, in my opinion, also apply to esports. You give it your all to win, every single time, and use whatever is legal to win, but as soon as the game is over, you display class and grace by thanking your opponent for the battle, regardless of the outcome. This is why I had a severe issue with Surge several splits ago when he refused to shake hands after a match. It's a horrible look for CRL and esports in general. Like it or not, when you become a pro, you also take on the responsibility of the game's public image and are expected to lead by example. Okay, so Belli obviously used a second screen to track elixir. As I said on Twitter, I consider it highly unprofessional for any team to not use a tool which can help them perform better. It is akin to not practising. Thus, as long as Supercell make this available, orgs should be using it, and I have no issues with it. I will never deny anyone the right to an opinion. Surge was fully entitled to make a statement regarding watching elixir, but I just didn't like how he handled it. This is why I mentioned displaying class and grace after a battle is over. What I saw from the iconic Goblin was salty and childish. He named his former team-mate and used the word "cheating". If I was in his shoes and felt the same way, I would have handled it differently. Eg., "Congrats to Belli, he was too good for me today. On a side note, I believe that we need to address screen watching because elixir counting is a skill which separates pros from regular players. Again, I do not wish to take anything away from Belli's performance today, but I feel this is a change we need to address asap simply for the credibility of pro plays" In other words, raise the issue without any detriment to the guy who just beat you. SUMMARY - Cream showed that they are the real deal whilst Liquid may still have some of the issues which have plagued them since their world title win despite the addition of Razzer. PAIN vs SSG - The Rf Show I'm sorry, but if you did not include Rf in your fantasy team for week one, then you are an elite level moron. A week ago, there wasn't a single person in the world who would have predicted the 2v2 battle would be between Sweep and Wallace for Pain vs Rf and Lapo for SSG. The Pain line up was a lottery simply because of the entirely new roster, but the absence of AC is another example of amateurish organisation by the admins of CRL esports. Ahh Craaaap is not the first pro player to have account issues from many years ago, he's probably about the tenth, but he is the first player to be given a ban for it. I'm sorry, but fucking what? You cannot go making up rules on the fly. For this event to grow, those running it must apply the highest standards of professionalism. If I owned an org and you banned one of my players for something others did not get a ban for, I'm on the fucking phone and yelling at you. This is actually so simple. If you have an issue then come out and say, "This is the rule and bans we are introducing FROM THIS POINT IN TIME. Anybody caught breaking them will be subject to the punishments". Don't make up a punishment when you catch someone. Even better still, just give everybody an amnesty and punish those who break the rules from today onwards, and not for shit they did after straight after WWII. *drops mic* Okay, so I loved the player cams, from Sweep's joy at the first win to Lapo's smirks, and of course the view of Rf's kitchen with AC cameos in the background. I especially loved Rf's yawn after he completed the sweep. We need this kind of friendly banter in the game. A few people might say, "Hang on a sec, Gramps, but what about showing class after the battle?" The question then becomes, so when is the battle over? For me, in that moment after you have just won, you are still on the field and the yawn was more for the fans than an attack on his opponents. After the game, Rf was full of his usual class and grace on social media. SUMMARY - This was a the battle of the very best vs a bunch of rookies and the result showed that. I still see a lot of promise in Pain. They are only going to improve with time and this split under their belt. Expect them to shock some teams late in the season. As for SSG, it was basically a one man show today and the only real GOD this atheist believes in, showed why he still is the best competitive player on the planet. QUESO vs MISFITS - Has the sleeping Cheese Giant awoken? When I was a kid in the 18th century, I used to watch a show called 'Lost in Space' about the Robinson family who were, surprise surprise, lost in space. They had a robot and it used to say, "DANGER! DANGER! Warning, Will Robinson" and that is how I felt watching Queso. I see some ominous signs and all I can say is, "DANGER! DANGER! Warning, all other teams" This format suits them to a tee. It appears they have settled upon using Cuchii and Benny as their 2v2 (I'm assuming they listened to me so I expect to receive public credit soon) which makes them look very, very hard to beat in KOTH. If their 2v2 pair only wins 50% of their matches, I expect the team to win about 75%, which puts them right near the top of the table. Then it comes down to that question I keep putting forward...can Ruben perform in big games under pressure? Right now there is no doubt that he's top 3 in the world as a 1v1 player, but his knees start shaking and his arse cheeks begin quivering when it comes to CRL playoffs, and mistakes are made. I hope this is the split the kid turns it around because he has huge potential. Misfits, like Pain, need a little more time, but it won't take long. Bob and May the Schwarz Be With You only need a few more games together to become a really solid pair. In KOTH, they are amongst the very best teams, and they are one of the few teams who can actually beat a line-up like Queso in this leg. I still expect them to finish strong, make the play-offs, and press for a spot in China. SUMMARY - I think many of us "expert" commentators have underestimated how much this format suits Queso. As soon as I finish typing this, I'm checking the schedule to see when they play SSG because that is going to be a show to watch. As for the defeated Misfits, no need to panic. All I see is lots of upside for them. **************************************************************************************** My fantasy team of Rf, Azilys, Schwarzen and Sam picked up 7 crowns. An excellent start with three of those players in action again tonight. I'm glad I stayed away from Pain players despite them having two matches. We had no idea who was playing where for them, and their opposition are tough. For tonight's games (in my time) I'm predicting 2-0 wins to SK, Tribe and Misfits, and unfortunately, a whole lot less controversy. Thanks for reading, Gramps